In Enduring Love, Matt uses the acronym STARVED to help couples examine seven basic needs that are critical to all healthy relationships. He says, "That's what you're called to do: to make each other feel Safe (physically, financially, socially, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually), to Trust each other, to Appreciate, to Respect, to Validate, to Encourage, and to be Dedicated. " He says most relationships are lacking in one or more of these areas, but he teaches how to feed a STARVED relationship and stay on the path to building an eternal bond with your spouse. He says, "In my mind, love is meeting those seven basic needs. "
He teaches that our covenants make the difference. "You are in a covenant. . . . Your covenant is with you and the Lord and your partner. Live your covenant. Christ is the exemplar of relationships. Are you resembling your Savior? "